Its better now,
I get little sleep.
By little sleep I mean I fall asleep roughly every 36 hours,
for half an hour.
He’s here, he’s here, he’s here.
Its happening all over again.
That’s when I wake up,
cold sweats and no breath;
just like that i’m broken all over again.
I used to fight it – i fought sleep,
but my the body got weary – the body shut down.
But the mind on the other hand…
I need a distraction, I need to breath again,
I need to snap out of the nightmare,
I need to be here and now,
I need to be here now.
I drag the caucus of my soul in front of the mirror,
I take a blade from the the table beside.
I draw it across my right wrist – vertically,
Just enough to feel, just enough to be back here and now.
Come morning, the wounds dry.
I adorn my wounds with multicoloured wrist bands,
no one knows,
no one can know,
crimson tears are not meant to be shown.