Writing as Anika – 01. Darkness.

Writing as Anika – a series of first person narratives putting post rape trauma in to perspective.

Processed with VSCOcam with hb2 preset
Processed with VSCOcam with hb2 preset

Did I not scream loud enough?

I don’t know, I don’t remember.

I can’t,

I can’t remember,

I can’t think.

I reach for the scrub – pouring it all over myself.

I hate my body, I do.

It doesn’t feel right,

it doesn’t feel mine.

I can still feel his grip,

I can still hear my screams.

I hate my body.

I want to tear it,

I want to remove it.

I wish I could take form of a reptile,

and creep out of my discarded body.

Why can’t I scrub it all off?

My body is bruised

My body is bleeding,

I can’t seem to scrub this crime scene off me,

How did it happen?

No, don’t think about it – scrub it all off.

It hurts, my insides hurt.

Everything turns dark.

.

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